The Ultimate Paradox of Discordianism

Posted by : Rev. Ouabache | Tuesday, June 9, 2009 | Published in

If they ever form a Discordian State, I shall tear it down. - The Good Reverend Roger

The only thing that can kill Discordia is success. - Anonymous

This, my friend, is the ultimate paradox of Discordianism: Even if all of our dreams came true we still wouldn't be satisfied. We don't want to win. We don't actually want to take over the world. If we were offered the crown we would outright refuse it. We aren't the kings and we never want to be. We are the rat bastards behind the throne. We are the advisers that lead the emperor around by the nose while constantly trying to find ways of poisoning his sons. We are the jesters in the corner poking fun of the king right to his fucking face and getting away with it. We are the insane monk leading the flock to certain ruin.

No, if we were ever in charge we wouldn't know what to do with ourselves. That's why we choose to always be on the fringes. We are the subversives who are constantly throwing rocks at the Establishment. It doesn't even matter who the Establishment is, they were stupid enough and greedy enough to get into power. That alone means that they are corrupt down to the little black hearts. We know because we would do the exact same thing if we had that power. We don't know the crown because we know that it isn't worth it. It's much more effective to work the edges and hope for Total Chaos.

Or Kill Me.

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